Giving a Little Thanks

The other morning my husband called me at home on my cell phone. As soon as I heard his ring tone, I assumed he needed me to do something. No big deal, that’s often the gist of our telephone conversations.  I hit the green ‘answer’ button and said hey.  He responded with a ‘hey’ back, and proceeded to tell me that I’d been on his mind and he just wanted to call and tell me he loved me.  I think my jaw dropped open. Not that he doesn’t love me or that he doesn’t tell me, but…he hadn’t done anything this spontaneous and sweet in quite a while. The call came out of the blue, and you know? It really made my day.

Simple, random, spontaneous displays of appreciation – what a wonderful and relatively easy way to lift the spirit and warm the heart of someone.  Makes me think.  Makes me think of those who have zipped in and out of my life over the years, the wonderful family and friends who currently touch my little world, and the people who I will meet in the future. Each person leaves me with a blessing, causes me to learn a little bit more about myself, more about our world, and for me – each one brings me that much closer to God.

Those of us here in America will soon be celebrating Thanksgiving.  Most will surround ourselves with family and friends – some whom we adore and some whom we find a little nutty. We will stuff ourselves with a nearly ridiculous amount of food, and we will play games, watch football, engage in good and not so good conversation, and participate in a host of crazy traditions that we find we absolutely must carry on whether they’re worthy or not.  As we sit down to a table full of turkey and ham and mashed potatoes and Grandma’s famous cranberry sauce and the stuffing that no one eats – most of us will take a moment to share our thanks.

Of course I won’t see most of you on Thanksgiving, and I know I’m not always good at letting you know how much I do appreciate you and how deeply you touch my life.  My husband’s act of a simple phone call, a few words expressed with sincerity and affection, lifted my spirit and brought about the theme for this blog. And I know I won’t be able to get all of this out when we sit down for dinner at our house and it’s my turn to share. So, here are my thanks:

Thank you…

To my husband – for your sense of humor and your support and encouragement, for never ever giving up on me, for loving me unconditionally, for the simplicity of being you.

To my kids – for your inspiration, for your hearts that have infinite depth and your spirits that reach out and touch everyone around you, for the connection I have with both of you that I will never have with anyone else, for being my little girls.

To my to-be son’s-in-law – for your faith in God, for your faith in my girls, for your open hearts and open minds, for the good families and friends who raised you.

To my extended family – for believing in me when I didn’t, for holding my hand when I needed it to be held, for carrying me when I needed to be carried, and for still being here.

To my female friends – for coming into my life when I needed you, for making me laugh and smile, for inspiring me to be a better person, and for movies and lunches and dinners and yoga and wine and skiing and Tahoe and walks and golf and childhood memories and the incredible act of friendship.

And to all of those who touch my life whether you’re a ski patroller, a fellow writer or blogger, a facebook buddy, or just an new or old friend  – Thank you all for bringing your smiles and your encouragement and your joy of living into my life. Thank you for teaching me a more about myself every time I’m with you or every time I read your words. Thank you for all of your gifts and for your willingness to share them.

Happy Thanksgiving

 

Am I Really That Competitive?

After a week of skiing in Tahoe and a couple of days in the mountains with our kids, I think my brain is finally beginning to function.  The Tahoe trip was with a really wonderful group of women who are on the same ski patrol as me.  I’m pretty sure all of us were hoping to hit the slopes for some spring skiing, but the weather didn’t quite cooperate that way.  High winds and incredible amounts of snow fall filled our days, but we did find a ton of powder and had a great time skiing some fabulous moguls.  Amazingly we all got along rather well, and as usually happens when I spend much time with a group of people, I learned a few things about myself.

 

I tend to be a believer in Howard Gardner’s Theory of Multiple Intelligences. In a nutshell the theory proposes that intelligence is not defined by one-mode of thinking or learning, but by several. There are multiple ways to be intelligent – verbally, mathematically, visually, kinesthetically, spiritually, musically, intrapersonally, and interpersonally.  All types intrigue me, but the interpersonal intelligence is one I find particularly fascinating.

Interpersonal intelligence has to do with self-perception and personal growth.  I have a tendency to constantly want to be a better person, to learn about myself, and to apply that knowledge.  Hanging out with others can be a great way to catch a new and hopefully refreshing view of who you are.  Oh, and your spouse can do that for you too!

For some reason that now escapes me I’ve usually seen myself as a rather laid back person.  But, after several days in Tahoe, it was pointed out, good-naturedly, that maybe that’s not the case.  I laughed, agreed (somewhat), and brought the story home to my husband, who looked at me like I was a crazy person! He definitely concurred with the ladies; laid back was not a descriptor he would use on me.  Okay, I had to concede.  They are all correct.

It all started with a relaxing evening in Tahoe, and I suppose a glass or two of wine.  A trivia type wine game was pulled out.  We drew questions, took turns, did not keep any kind of score, and had some great laughs – especially when Stephanie had to sing Old McDonald had some wine!  After several rounds we were ready to move on.  A couple of women wanted to watch a movie, the rest of us decided on a ‘friendly’ game of Scrabble.

 

Admittedly, I’m a bit competitive. And yes, you’re right, a competitive person is not necessarily laid back.  As stated before I’m constantly striving to better myself. I always want to win. I want to be first to finish any kind of test, but not only do I want to be first, I want to get the best grade. If a challenge is laid down, I’ll typically rise to the occasion and strive to meet it head on. And I pretty much never give up.  Scrabble was a challenge.  We played four rounds, each of us won a round, and each team won two rounds. We played until two o’clock in the morning. I was not being laid back. And dare I say- a rematch has already been proposed!

It’s not always easy to hear what others think of you.  In this case I lucked out – I thoroughly enjoyed the honesty, got a great laugh, and totally agree. I’m especially amused by my earlier perception, and my reaction!  That’s not always been the case, but I do usually try to pay attention, especially when the same opinion gets expressed again and again by a variety of people. Usually there’s some truth and the viewpoint is worth heeding. 

Interpersonal intelligence, self-perception, and the perceptions of others – it’s all worthwhile and excellent for personal growth and awareness.  Listen to what those around you are saying, listen to your inner voice, and open yourself up to new thoughts and new experiences. After all, isn’t that what life is all about? 

Cheers to my good friends and fellow skiing buddies.  Here’s to an even better trip next year!