Community. That’s a big word with a lot of meaning. A flourishing community has a strong vision and encompasses so much of what we all need – a sense of belonging, a place where we are needed, and most importantly a group that builds us up and encourages us to better ourselves. A community can thrive, ride the middle ground, and/or struggle. A struggling community can work together to rebuild or it can struggle to the point of destruction. A struggling community can pull members down, it can break them, and on occasion the community will dissolve and become something else altogether. I am seeing the pain of stressed communities all around us, especially with the ongoing entanglement of Covid 19.
Communities exist in numerous configurations – neighborhoods, church groups, schools, work places, clubs, volunteer organizations, and even family and friendship circles. When we join a community, we find people with whom we feel comfortable and safe, it’s generally because we are like-minded in some way. We share a passion, a belief, a common interest, genetics, marriage … some common bond that ties us together. Embracing a community where we belong and with whom we engage can be exhilarating, but it can also be terrifying. Once we become a part of a community we feel safe, let our guard down, and risk vulnerablility.
During my thirty years as a professional educator I found myself drawn to people with a similar academic philosophy that I have. I believe that real learning isn’t about rote memorization, it’s about teaching kids to think. It’s not the facts that matter, it’s the process. The educators and parents and board members who were attracted into any organization I led believed in providing kids with engaging, hands-on, open-ended, courageous learning experiences. We believed in giving kids opportunities where they were required to question, analyze, interpret, collaborate, and innovate. These school communities learned to work together toward common academic, social and emotional goals. The connections we made with each other often felt unbreakable. We encouraged and built up the students, and in the process did the same for the staff and families. On occasion the communities struggled and members left. Unfortunately, some left broken. Fortunately, most of those struggles made the communities stronger in their beliefs and bonds.
In my life as a volunteer ski patroller I enjoy another kind of community. This is a community of people who have a passion for the sport, and have a passion for assisting guests in the outdoor sports environment. My connection, the sense of community I have with the many volunteer and paid patrollers I work with and I know nationally, differs from that connection I had in my professional career. This is a community of similar-minded individuals who seek to grow in their skill sets and leadership abilities in order to provide the highest standard of first-aid care to others in the outdoor environment. And similar to many communities, this community also struggles and strives to push through difficulties with the hope of coming out on the other side as a stronger and healthy group of people.
Friendship and family communities are similar. They argue and disagree, but they also celebrate and share joy. It would be great to say, “I found this community of like-minded individuals where I can clearly become a better person, and I am 100% confident that these people will never ever let me down or hurt me.” But that rarely happens. In today’s world I see communities struggling everywhere. Families, friendships, schools, churches, work places, and so on.
It’s hard, and sometimes impossible, but I would encourage any struggling group of people who view themselves as a community to put aside your differences and come together with the goal of remembering why you became a community in the first place. If you’re a family, talk about all of the positive characteristics and memories you share; if you’re an organization, go back to your mission statement and core values. Dissect them, discuss them, determine current relevance and then begin to rebuild. Put together a deliberate plan to put yourself back together using common goals and strategic thinking. Let the politics, the hurtful words, and the petty arguments stay at the door. Swallow your pride. If your community is worth it, fight for it.
Communities are essential. Coretta Scott King, wife of Martin Luther King Jr. said, “The greatness of a community is most accurately measured by the compassionate actions of its members.” Open your hearts, open your minds, find that compassion, and remember why you need community and what defines your long term vision. It’s possible you need a shift, but it’s also possible that your community can reconnect and once again begin to thrive.
Please jump on this blog with your community stories. I’d very much like to hear from those of you struggling and those succeeding. We can create a new community of support by sharing ideas and asking questions.
Shelley's Sagacious Slants 